The love child of Chris-Ann-Joan-Laurene Woznan and Apple CEO Steve Jobs was born today at 11:20 AM at the Mayo Clinic in New York City. What startled Doctor John Leibowitz was that the baby was born wearing tiny washed out jeans and the signature Jobs black turtleneck.
The boy, named iJobs-G5, came in at 6 lbs, 4 oz and is completely healthy, except it was not determined whether or not the clothes would pose a health risk for the baby or the mother, though ever thing seemed to be in order.
"My iJobs-G5 is beautiful, he's so small and compact, he reminds me of my laptop, except there's no headphone jack" Jobs said later that day to associated press, adding only that the child will likely go into the bin where he keeps all his children, and that he had nothing further to comment.
This child makes Jobs' 119,000,000th, which coincidentally matches the number of iPods sold to the public. The number is expected to increase after the recently launched advertisement campaigns for the iPod Nano and Touch.
"He's just such a beautiful man" said Woznan, Jobs' mistress, "Something about his shapely figure and design just drew me to him. Plus he invented the iPhone, I mean, he invented it."
Whatever the reason, Jobs' love streak seems to be going on without end, since it's beginning in 2001. Laurene Powel, Jobs' wife, has not said anything about the screw-a-thon, but is expected to release a statement sometime in the coming months.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
My guess is that Job's wife isn't saying anything because she's the real mother. Click the link, scroll down a bit and check out her picture at the California College of the Arts website.
Everyone knows that the genetic trait for black turtlenecks is carried by the mother.
http://www.cca.edu/about/press/2006/newtrusteesspr06
Post a Comment